51 Best Dirty Jokes for Her to Juice Up Your Relationship

dirty jokes for her

Dirty Jokes for Her: Do you want to spice up your relationship? Or want to cook romance? Whatever it is, dirty jokes for your girlfriend always help you make her turn on.

People think that girls don’t like to receive dirty jokes but let me tell you that there are only two types of girls worldwide. One who wants to receive dirty jokes and one who says that she doesn’t but is lying. They might not like to receive dirty jokes from everyone. So, before sending any dirty joke to a girl, make sure that you are one of her closest.

In this world of independence, one must not be ashamed of a naughty sense of humor. There is no shame at all in laughing at dirty jokes. So, keep your shame aside and read on to find the dirtiest and filthy jokes for her. Moreover, a little bit of naughtiness is a must in every relationship.

Dirty Jokes for Her

You must be careful and try not to crack these jokes in any formal space. Go on and check out these best dirty jokes for your partner that we have assembled for you to juice up your dull relationship.

  • Best Dirty Jokes for Her
  • Double Meaning Jokes for Her
  • Funny Dirty Jokes for Her

Best Dirty Jokes for Her

1. How is playing bridge similar to sex? If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

2. “Sex is like pizza, if you’re going to use bbq sauce you better know what the fu*k you’re doing.” (Mike Ginn)

dirty jokes for her

3. Life is like a penis… Often hard for no reason!

4. I think sex is better than logic, but I can’t prove it.

5. 69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

6. How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By becoming a ventriloquist.

7. What did the penis say to the v*gina? Don’t make me come in there!

8. Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

9. Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.

10. Why couldn’t the lizard get a girlfriend? Because he had a reptile dysfunction!

Double Meaning Jokes for Her

11. What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? “I want you inside me.”

12. What’s another name for a v*gina? The box a penis comes in.

13. Lick me ’till ice cream.

dirty jokes for her

14. Who’s the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts.

15. What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lick-a-lotta-puss.

16. A naked man broke into a church. The police chased him around and finally caught him by the organ.

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17. Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.

18. “Dear NASA: Your mom thought I was big enough.” Signed, Pluto

19. Why does a mermaid wear seashells? Because she outgrew her B-shells!

20. What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

Funny Dirty Jokes for Her

21. What’s the difference between your penis and a bonus check? Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.

22. How do you make a pool table laugh? Tickle its balls.

23. What’s the best part about gardening? Getting down and dirty with your hoes.

24. What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? Beef strokin’ off!

25. What do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip-off!

26. Why do vegans give better heads? They’re used to eating nuts.

27. What do you call the lesbian version of a c*ck block? A beaver dam!

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28. What do you do when your cat’s dead? Play with the neighbor’s pussy instead.

29. What is Moby Dick’s dad’s name? Papa Boner.

30. “Name something you can say during Game of Thrones and sex. The ending was disappointing.” (@fantasticthor)

31. I lost my keys… can I check your pants?

dirty jokes for her

32. What did one butt cheek say to the other? Together, we can stop this crap.

33. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife died.

34. What’s the best part about sex with 28-year-olds? There are twenty of them.

35. I’m not a weatherman, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.

36. What did the clit*ris say to the vulva? It’s all good in the hood!

37. Why is diarrhea hereditary? It runs in your genes!

38. I just found an origami p*rn channel, but it’s a paper view only.

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39. Let’s play carpenter! First, we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.

40. What did the leper say to the sex worker? Keep the tip.

dirty jokes for her

41. What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!

42. How is life like toilet paper? You’re either on a roll or taking s*** from someone.

43. It goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet. What is it? Bubblegum.

44. “I bet you can’t tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time,” a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, “Your penis is bigger than your brother’s.”

45. What is a long, wide thing that men carry hanging in front of it? Tie.

best dirty jokes for her

1. Why did the female squirrel blush? Because she saw the male squirrel’s nuts!

2. What’s the difference between a washing machine and a woman? You can dump your load in a washing machine without it getting jealous!

3. Why did the girl bring a ladder to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house!

4. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in her!

5. Why did the woman bring a ladder to the bedroom? She wanted to climb the corporate ladder!

6. What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they’re both stuck-up c**ts!

7. Why don’t women need a driver’s license? There’s no road between the bedroom and the kitchen!

8. What do you call it when a woman sneezes during her period? A red discharge!

9. Why did the woman go shopping for a new mattress? She heard sleeping around was a good way to get ahead!

10. Why did the woman refuse to play cards with the jungle animals? Because she was afraid of cheetahs!

flirty knock knock jokes

  • 1. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Ivana.

Ivana who?

Ivana do dirty things to you, baby!

  • 2. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Lick.

Lick who?

Lick me like a lollipop, honey!

  • 3. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Spank.

Spank who?

Spank me, I’ve been naughty!

  • 4. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Grab.

Grab who?

Grab hold of those dirty thoughts and let’s make them a reality!

  • 5. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Moan.

Moan who?

Moan my name and I’ll fulfill your dirtiest desires.

  • 6. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Whip.

Whip who?

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Whip out your wildest fantasies, I’m ready to play!

  • 7. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Tease.

Tease who?

Tease me until I can’t resist your dirty charms.

  • 8. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Pleasure.

Pleasure who?

Pleasure me, baby, and I’ll take you to cloud nine!

  • 9. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Touch.

Touch who?

Touch me in all the right places and let’s get down and dirty!

  • 10. Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Seduce.

Seduce who?

dirty jokes for wife

1. Why did the wife refuse to bring her husband breakfast in bed? Because she said, “I don’t do lunch in bed!”

2. What did the husband say to his wife when she asked him to take out the trash? “Why should I? I already took you out!”

3. What’s the difference between a wife and a washing machine? After 10 years, the washing machine doesn’t start to ignore you!

4. Why did the wife leave her husband after he told a dirty joke? Because she said, “I’m not your punchline, I’m your wife!”

5. What do you call a wife who leaves her dirty dishes in the sink? A “dishonest” woman!

6. Why did the wife refuse to go to the baseball game with her husband? Because she heard there would be a lot of “foul” balls!

7. How does a wife know her husband is cheating on her with a dirty joke? Because he can’t help but laugh at someone else’s punchline!

8. What do you call a wife who can balance a beer on her head and tell a dirty joke at the same time? A “multi-tasking mistress”!

9. Why did the wife hide her phone after telling a dirty joke? Because she didn’t want her husband to see all the “uncensored” laughter!

10. What did the wife say to her husband after he made a dirty joke at the family dinner? “If you can’t clean up your act, then maybe it’s time for a dirty divorce!”

Seduce me with your dirtiest thoughts and let’s indulge in pure ecstasy!

Share one of the above funny and dirty jokes with your girlfriend, wife, or partner. I am sure that these dirty jokes for her will help you to start a fresh communication and make a move in your relationship.

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